2. Handling discomfort within your team
In many teams, difficult conversations are often avoided.
Sometimes people may leave discussions quickly, because the situation feels uncomfortable, rather than because of harm. In youth organisations and activist spaces, these uncomfortable conversations are inevitable, that’s what makes recognising the difference between discomfort and harm extremely important.
Discomfort can be part of learning and collaboration. It can help people better understand each other, reflect on their views, and grow. Harm, on the other hand, must always be taken seriously and addressed.
There is a difference between discomfort and harm.
- Discomfort: feeling challenged, stretched, unsure, defensive, embarrassed, or emotionally activated.
- Harm: being threatened, humiliated, discriminated against, bullied, or made unsafe.
Why this matters
Discomfort can help us grow, while harm must be addressed and stopped.
Strong teams are able to:
- stay engaged in challenging conversations,
- support each other through moments of discomfort,
- and respond clearly and collectively when harm occurs
What this chapter offers
This chapter is designed to help teams explore the difference between discomfort and harm in internal discussions. The session outline below offers simple reflection exercises and practical tools to help team members stay engaged in challenging conversations, build emotional awareness, and create shared agreements that support respectful dialogue, learning, and collaboration within the team.
Next chapter
3. Mastering difficult conversations
This chapter focuses on working together, even in cases when it sounds difficult or even impossible.